Don't Treat Your Customer Like This

A friend of mine, Roger Millington, is one of the funniest and most able copywriters I know.

So I will let him introduce this idea in his inimitable fashion: don't treat the customer like a ****.

You can fill in the asterisks to suit yourself. They probably stand for "clot" or "fool".

What is really a shame is when a firm which has always treated customers well stops doing so.

Since 1993 I have shown in seminars an excellent example of a thank-you letter from Viking Direct to my old PA, Denise.

However, before she moved to greener pastures she showed me three more letters from Viking that arrived at once, all addressing her as Valued Customer.

This phrase in fact means precisely the opposite of what it says.

It means "even though you've been buying things from us for fifteen years we can't be bothered to make a note of your name."

Don't use the phrase, whatever you do.

A much better example of this sort of folly came from Jack Barclay who wrote to me a while ago. Click here to see their letter - it raises a number of interesting questions:

1) Can't they be bothered to write personally to somebody who has squandered countless thousands on their wretched vehicles?*

2) Can't they be bothered to find out what I drive. (I don't drive at all actually - my wife does) - especially bearing in my mind that they seem to think I am a member of their family?

3) Just as a matter of interest when they wrote I had a flat 100 yards away from their offices and my wife was perfectly able to tell you the name of their service manager - and a quite a few other members of their staff.

The great American merchant Julius Rosenwald who built up Sears, Roebuck and Co to be the world's biggest retailer said his ambition was to stand on both sides of the counter at once.

This is hard to do, but at the very least I recommend the following three part helpful hint which I first coined for a talk at American Express in New York some years ago:

1) Respect your customer

2) Stay close to your customer

3) Use your imagination

Best,
Drayton

P.S.  This is number 22 of Drayton Bird’s 101 free helpful marketing ideas.  You can sign up on the link below for the rest.

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